The more emotionally intelligent (often termed EQ) amongst us do better in life than those who are not. Those who are in touch with their feelings and emotions, and who are able to make balanced decisions despite feeling like reacting emotionally, make better choices. Furthermore, it has even been shown that children who are emotionally intelligent do better both academically and socially than those who are not.
Emotional intelligence (EQ) is a better predictor
of academic and social success than IQ.
We are at our most healthy when we can utilize constructive thinking, feelings and behaviour together so that we operate as an integrated human being. Furthermore, those who are emotionally intelligent, who understand and can manage their inner emotional states effectively, do better in relationships because their interpersonal skills are enhanced by their connectedness to their emotions, and the ability to empathize that flows from that connectedness. Emotional intelligence has even been claimed as a requirement for sound investment decisions. This is because when we are emotionally out of balance, so too is our ability to think logically and rationally. I’m sure you can think back to actions you took when you were feeling emotional that in retrospect were not such wise choices.
Therefore, people who are emotionally intelligent are more in control, have more influence, succeed more, and have better relationships than those who are not. Emotional intelligence, therefore, will empower you to have a better life. Not only that, you will be better able to think rationally in emotionally challenging situations, and you will feel better through being more connected to yourself and less reactive to other people.
Those who manage their emotions effectively
are generally more successful, and happier, in life.
While emotions are a feature of everyone’s life (even though they may be suppressed), they are not a conscious feature of everyone’s life. When emotions are operating automatically, whether suppressed or expressed, there are risks that they will get in the way of helpful rational behaviour. Emotions, for many people, seem to have an agenda all of their own, and this is what can make emotions such a liability for them.
Like most people, you may not be particularly good at identifying and naming all the emotions that you feel. Even emotionally intelligent people are better able to feel and detect some emotions than others. Again, time and practice will help you to learn to detect and name emotions, and what they are telling you about yourself.
Some leading research exploring the development of moral decision-making seems to have totally overlooked the role of emotions in that process, as if moral thinking could be made devoid of an ability to empathize. The bottom line here is that we become better integrated and balanced human beings when we are able to listen to, name, respond to and own our feelings and emotions, and use them appropriately in relationships by expressing how we feel, and what those feelings mean for us.
Many social, professional and other life skills
also require emotional competence
if success is to be assured.
(Excerpt from The 12 Choices of Winners, Book 1 in The Spiritual Life Mastery Series, by Jeffery Saunders. The associated cartoons cannot be displayed.)
Those who feel more, succeed more.